What Inspires Me……………..

Archive for January, 2012

Expressing our pain

One of the challenges is finding ways to express our feeling
when I am really hurting
I find it the most challenging time
sometimes I am good at just saying I hurt and be in the hurt
this past time with all going on with my family and Dad I was
able to do it for the most part
I kept my story out of most of it
yet said my feeling of how I was feeling without
explaining everything

Sometimes when it all hurts more then we can take
it is important to blur it all out to one person that we can trust
this helps us get the pain and sorrow out
tell our story, be heard and validated
and allow us to find what is really behind it all

It is balance
finding a positive way to say what is going on is easy for
small things and that is where we start
then we add to it as we go along
I believe there are also times
we must get out what we feel in order to process
and heal the pain which is inside us 

I feel that there is a time for our hurt and anger to
be spoken so we can heal the yuck that is inside us
eating us up in more ways then we understand
with the right person to hear us we are able to feel
safe as we express the ugly stuff stuck inside 

There is a time and place for all our feelings
by honoring ourselves and being fine with feeling
the yuck and using what method we can use
where we don’t harm others or ourselves as we
express our pain

We are able to move forward into our hearts and
live with positive words to express our feelings
leaving out the story and negative
which comes from old programing
and habits we picked up on throughout our life


The holiday time is one of many trials and tribulations
with our lives today
many families live around the country
even around the world
how do we connect with our family
and also have our lives too

Many of us are older and have children of our own
enough of us have our children grown and out of our homes
caught between our own children
our siblings and parents (the ones that are still here)
there seems not enough time in our lives these
days to be in several places at once

How do we fare
Do we buy gifts to help with the guilt
Do we go and see them
spending much time and money standing in line
at airports
Do we make sure everyone is happy at the expense of

There is this thing called guilt
and it seems to really pull on us more
when the holiday season is abound
guilt for not having enough money to buy
everyone what they want and leaving some people out
guilt for not being at everyone’s gathering
guilt for not wanting to give all our holiday time
to those we don’t like
and guilt for not liking what others bought us
for gifts

seems like we spend more time feeling guilty
about the holiday season
because we can’t make everyone happy
and the one person not on our list
is ourself

more and more as I get older
I find the holiday is about what makes me happy
and when I am happy
those I care most about are happy too
This holiday season I did what I desired to do

the funny thing is my children were happy
even though I didn’t go see them
they had other family to visit with
made it easy for all of us
they didn’t have to pick and choose
I went on a road trip and caught up with old
friends of mine
and spent time by myself walking beaches
one of my most favorite things to do

Next holiday season
who knows what will happen
I just decided to start a new tradition
this one involves
Making me happy first
My children seem to have caught on
they like the idea of us all doing what makes us happy

we have all year to see each other
it doesn’t have to be on the holidays
giving us more freedom and much pleasure
to just be able to enjoy our time together
with many great memories